A mum who has experienced three miscarriages is urging others with similar issues to talk about their losses.
Alison Merrison, of Fleet Hargate, has won an award for speaking out about her losses, particularly that of her son Freddie.
Alison (36) went into labour just 18 weeks into the pregnancy with him. She had to undergo an induced labour which lasted 12 hours.
“Before 24 weeks it is classed as miscarriage,” said Alison, who had one before and another after Freddie.
“That’s really hard when you’ve felt him and you’ve been able to hold your tiny baby. It was horrific; the worst time of my life. I wouldn’t wish it on anybody.
“The hardest thing is, when you’ve had him, you have to leave him there. You feel empty without your child.
“I think you’re also ashamed of what your body has done to you.”
This week is Baby Loss Awareness Week (October 9-15) and Alison wanted to speak about the loss she experienced along with husband Rick and their six year-old son Harry.
“I’ve explained to Harry that Freddie is a little star in the sky who is watching over him,” Alison continued. “He’s always asking if we can look for Freddie. We’ll find a star so we can speak to him.
“It’s hard for Harry as he’s desperate for a brother who is here so he can play with him.
“He still has a shrine for him in his room. We like to have a cake on Freddie’s birthday and Harry likes to send up a balloon for him to play with.”
Alison wants to highlight the importance of talking to others, as she says she has lost friends because they don’t know what to say.
“We’re the same people, we just sometimes have sad moments,” she continued. “I get it, it’s hard to know what to say, especially if they’ve got children. I don’t think anyone really prepares for it.
“My sister Kelly has been absolutely brilliant,” she added.
Alison is also full of praise for her colleagues at Lincolnshire Co-Op where she’s worked in the Long Sutton branch for 14 years.
Because there was a long waiting list for counselling on the NHS, her employer managed to assign her one within two weeks.
“They’ve been really supportive, especially my boss,” Alison said.
“Nobody seems to want to talk about having a miscarriage when there are people out there who have had one. That’s even though it is fairly common.
“I don’t want anybody who has had a miscarriage to think they’re all alone.
“I’d say to anyone going through it, try to talk to anyone who will listen.
“You’re not alone and there are plenty of people out there in the same situation and going through the same emotions.”
